What that critical inner voice is really trying to tell you.

August 10, 2016

Is there a negative voice in your head?

Seems like a rhetorical question; almost everyone complains of an inner voice that criticizes you for eating certain things you “shouldn’t” eat, doing things less than perfectly, making mistakes that can happen to anyone, and do.

Strangely, this inner critic is trying to protect you. The negative voices in our heads are an offshoot of fear, which is like a smoke alarm; its purpose is to keep us out of trouble and help us stay safe.

Fear has been part of our natural hardwiring for thousands of years, but its settings in modern times can be a bit wonky. Our fear sensors don’t really know the difference between a seething boss and a burning building. It all goes through the same filter and makes our bodies react with stress.

Knowing this can help you reframe the way you view the negative voice in your head. Understanding that this inner critic is actually a mechanism of fear that is trying to keep us safe has helped me and the students I teach keep from adding to the stress level with self-judgment and self-condemnation.

The next time you hear this negative inner voice, have compassion for yourself. Use the Yoga Tool of Maitri, which means kindness or friendliness. And try this trick: Every time you’re in front of a mirror, smile at yourself. The physical act of smiling prompts positive chemical release in the brain. You don’t have to wait for a reason to be happy to feel that way. Smile at yourself the way you’d smile at someone you loved. (Another happiness boosting trick: Smile at others, too.)

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